supermomdoesntlivehere

Because motherhood will never be a perfect science

Slow as Molasses

Whoever came up with this saying didn’t know Baby girl. The word slow is an understatement to put it mildly. This child has no care to rush for ANYTHING. Picture the mornings…it hurts me to think of it especially since it’s only Monday.  The child will tell me 3 stories and show me 2 boo boos, explain why she hasn’t yet brushed her teeth and tattle tale on her sister each morning to use up at least a good 20 minutes of each morning. It’s enough to make me want to pull my hair out. Only when I’m on the verge of a total momma meltdown will she speed up from a slow walk to a quaint skip. The crazy thing is that it truly is a part of her make up. Or maybe that’s what I tell myself so I don’t send her packing  (to Nana’s house of course ). But even the way she was born was slow…I wouldn’t dilate! The OB-GYN was baffled since my first delivery was literally 5 hours including labour and the birth  (totally not bragging); and even though it was still a relatively short labour (6 1/2 hours), it should have been my first clue that this child had her own internal schedule.

But I’m not the only one that sees it. Her nickname in her kindergarten after school program was ‘slowpoke’ (only her favourite program director called her that). When she was leaving kindergarten and transferring schools in grade one, her kindergarten teacher gave her the book ‘The Tortoise and the Hare”. See what I mean?

But as slow as she can be some days she is also very much like that tortoise in the book…very determined. Whether it’s early potty training, progressing to chapter books, learning to jump rope or drive her mother crazy; that child never waivers…she takes it slow.

Slow as molasses.

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Another Mother’s Day 

Here’s to hoping you all had a wonderful Mother’s day or you made it a special day for any mother figures in your life.

I love the breakfast  (not in bed) and the handmade crafts and cards that say “You’re the Best Mom Ever!” I love the extra hugs and kisses and being able to sit for five minutes and feel like a queen.

Yup…

Before the sibling quarrels kick in and the hubby is cranky from “slaving over a hot stove” and mom duties must be resumed…

Sigh…

I vote for Mother’s WEEK. One day just isn’t enough. 

Who’s with me?

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Finally…but not quite

You know the excitement you feel when the kids are finally in bed and you actually have a chance to do something for yourself?

Read that book

Write that story

Watch that movie

Call that friend

Then you wake up at 3:30 in the morning and realize you fell asleep on the couch as soon as you sat down.

I think that’s known as an ‘epic fail’…

…or motherhood. 

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The Diva…

The Diva had her 10th birthday recently. 

“Mommy, am I close to being a teen now?”

“Nope, you’re far away. Far, far away from being a teen.”

What?

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She’s how old?

So the Diva will be ten years old in a few days.

Yes…TEN!

How the hell did that happen? 

Ugh!

She’s growing way too fast. She’s confident, cheeky, funny, loud, quirky and knows too much for her own good.

She’s so loving and drives me up the freakin wall!

Why is she growing up so fast?

Who the heck does she think she is? 

Losing all that baby fat; walking and talking; riding a bike; a scooter and a skateboard. Playing soccer and measuring herself against me to see how tall she is. 

Ha! Joke’s on her since I’m short anyway.

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Weekend Blues

It’s another Sunday afternoon and I’m trying not to wish that tomorrow wasn’t another freakin Monday. I mean seriously…who invented Mondays anyway?  What purpose do they serve other than to remind you that the weekend is over and cover you in a blanket of the “I don’t wanna go back to work ” blues? Can we just skip to Tuesdays where we say “Ok…I made it to Tuesday. Not long now.”

Then Wednesday is ‘hump day’ and we can see the finish line. Thursday we’re practically salivating because Friday is just within reach. 

Then it’s FRIDAY!  Thank all that is lovely and bright in the world!!!  We made it…oh yes we did!

Enjoy that 2 days of anything but work. Which includes swimming lessons, soccer games, gymnastics, hockey or whatever sport your kids play. Oh…did you think you were gonna fit a hair appt in there or get your nails done? Ha! Silly girl! Did you buy groceries or pick up the milk your hubby forgot? Run some more errands why don’t you? By the way, the kids have a presentation due that they forgot to tell you about. Aren’t you the lucky one? Why is your eye twitching? Yes, the left one.

Okay, finally everything that needs to be done is done…or shoved into a corner. I won’t tell. Time to relax and enjoy a little ‘me time’. Until you realize that it’s Sunday evening and you have to prep for work the next day.

You know…for MONDAY. 

Another freakin Monday. 

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New Year 2017

Here we are in a new year!

It’s 2017! How amazing is that? 

We survived…

Another year of parenting our beautiful children. The babies,  school agers, preteens and teenagers. 

Tantrums, tears, runny noses, boo boos, rebellion, little spills, big messes, sibling fights and the temporary loss of your sanity…on a fairly consistent  basis.

We did it.

…and now we get to do it again for another year.

Stop crying and get a glass…I’ll get the wine. 

Happy new year! 🙂

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Boxing Day

Boxing Day…

The day after all your stress and anxiety have come to fruition.

When you realize you spent too much money for one day and you promise yourself that you won’t  do it again next year.

When you realize how spoiled your kids really are and how blessed you all are.

When you realize you’ve eaten way too much and worked out way too little.

When you admit you’ve had a little too much wine but you aren’t ready to commit to less just yet…because there’s still New Years to come.

When you try to decide if you’ll brave the shopping frenzy or sit at home in an “I’m not doing a thing today” stupor.

When you’re husband takes a 4 hour nap and your kids make you play all of their new board games for 5 hours.

When you look at all the leftovers and think…”What the hell are we gonna do with all this food?”

When the day seems long then all of a sudden it’s time for bed.

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There are days when I feel like an elastic band being stretched between motherhood, marriage and balancing a relationship with my parents. If I stretch too far one way I may break and if I don’t stretch enough another way someone’s feelings are hurt. Some days I feel a bit brittle as if the elastic may snap.

Good thing I’ve got chocolate, wine and good friends. All the things you need to keep you flexible.

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Painting Lulu Review

So my kids have been fascinated for the past 2 days with a new app called Painting Lulu. A friend recommended the app to me for Baby Girl (six years old), who loves to color and draw.

What is Painting Lulu you ask? (And so you should)

Well, it’s a really great way to engage your children in creative activities (and not just because you want time to yourself with a glass of wine). Basically, you download the app of the coloring pages your child wants to use (i.e. My Little Pony, Barbie, Transformers, etc). Then, simply choose the coloring pages option and select a picture to color on screen. In this option, they can also take a picture of an object or person and turn it into a picture that they can then color.

Also available for purchase from Painting Lulu (www.paintinglulu.com) is a coloring book with “paper to digital” pages that can be colored on and then scanned (using the app) to a mobile device. From there, kids can continue to color on screen. A crayon shaped stylus is provided with the coloring book which is small enough for little hands and made of a very flexible material that makes it easy to hold. They come in different colors and won’t damage the screen if your child is overcome with excitement.

Wait…is that just my kids?

In the page scanner option, they can scan a page from their coloring book, which will then appear in the app and allow them to color right on the screen.

The photo booth option takes it one step further by enabling your kids to take a selfie and upload it into the app with one of the characters from the coloring book. Did I mention they can color that on screen too?

The color options are very vast, with varying shades of greens, reds, blues, and so on and there is the option to use a crayon, paintbrush or marker effect. This makes it easy to create several different masterpieces with just one picture. But there are a variety of pictures available, so the outcome is really only limited by your child’s imagination!

By the way…the kids can save their pictures in an online gallery.

Baby Girl loves this app and even my very sophisticated Diva girl who at nine, is now too cool to like the same things as her younger sister; was engaged for an hour just trying the different effects. A certain adult that shall remain nameless had some fun too. (No, I’m not telling you my name)

 

What my kids loved about it:

  1. The crayon shaped stylus – comfortable for small hands and easy to use
  2. Multiple coloring options including crayons, markers or painting in a gazillion colors (yes, I said gazillion!)

 

What my kids would change:

  1. The trash can icon should be moved to another page to avoid accidental deletion. We had a few broken hearted moments when they lost their first masterpieces.

Overall, both my kids and I think this is a really fun app. You should check  out the fun at www.paintinglulu.com!

 

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